n 2010, His Holiness the Dalai Lama gave a talk in Canada and said something that helped me recognize that I have a certain kind of privilege–and a certain kind of power–that I didn’t see before.
The Dalai Lama told the crowd that he is a feminist, and that as a feminist he believes that women from the Western world have the power to come to the rescue of the world at large. For me, that meant sharing painful stories with my women colleagues around the world to make it easier for them to do the same.
At my first job, I had to wear pantyhose, and my boss at the jewelry store checked my adherence to the rule by running his hand down my leg every time I clocked in. The sick feeling of unease this gave me is known to girls and women of all ages. The knowing that it was wrong but not having the knowledge or the power to change it and worse, feeling that it was somehow my fault. I put up with this for many reasons, but mostly because I was 18 in college and needed the extra money. They also allowed me to bring my index study cards, but I had to keep them hidden and was not allowed to bring in any books. Message received - pretty girls did not need to be reading.
I used to tell stories and anecdotes like this to women in my global company, and I would hear the distinct sound of their hitched breath. It shocked my friends and proteges worldwide–from India to Eastern Europe, the Middle East, New York, and Louisiana. They would tell me privately that they thought I was courageous for saying such things on a worldwide stage. But I had learned something–by sharing my own story, I showed my female colleagues that they are seen and that they have a safe place to tell their own stories.
The following is a set of perspectives gathered through the collective wisdom of women around the world. These perspectives showcase the cognitive dissonance felt every day by women who work–and often thrive–in contexts that don’t necessarily invite them to succeed and often reward them for staying small and quiet and "good”. These are also love letters to those women who, unseen and unsung, champion other women by pushing for systemic change, often at significant risk to themselves and their families.
–Beth Rudden
Don’t Despise Small Beginnings- Chandra’s Story
Ten years ago, while I was working as a full-time employee at Louisiana State University and raising two beautiful girls, I also owned a Mommy & Me boutique in a small community in southern Louisiana. As a mom, I always had a passion for positively impacting other moms and women. Although my impact was local to a small town in Louisiana at the time, it was very meaningful. In fact, it was the start of an amazing journey that would eventually allow my impact to span across the country and beyond. It was an essential piece of the journey that led me to The Mom Project and beyond.
Everything I have been through–each job that I’ve had, every challenge I've faced–has allowed me to be a source of inspiration in the lives of the many women I connect with on a daily basis.
As the Vice President of RISE at The Mom Project, I am thrilled to lead an initiative that helps other moms and women of color gain access to greater economic opportunities. I started my career as a high school Spanish teacher and strategically pivoted, multiple times, in order to get access to economic opportunity and to the life that I’d been dreaming of. I moved from Louisiana to Silicon Valley to find greater economic opportunities for me and my family and now, with RISE, I can create the same opportunities for other women without forcing them to move across the country.
Searching for Identity and Agency- Yustina’s Story
I was never really able to put a finger on my identity. I never really fit. I was born in Austin, Texas, but lived most of my childhood and early professional career in Cairo, Egypt. There, I was always accused of being “too liberal,” “too westernized,” “too emboldened,” even as I strove to dress on the more modest and conservative side compared to my colleagues. I was 24 and alone when I moved to New York City with only two pieces of luggage–one filled with clothing and the other with my most treasured possessions, my books. I soon understood that I didn’t fit in here, either. But then I realized something–neither did any woman or any person in NYC. We were all misfits, and we were proud of it. I am still proud of it.
By some kind of coincidence, I found myself at the head of the Labor Market Information division for the State of New Jersey, managing a team of 65 people, only to become 100 as the Great Recession took us all by surprise. With this sudden onslaught of responsibility, I discovered within myself a power and a voice for transformation that I didn’t know I had. I pushed for a new paradigm for workforce development. That paradigm became a foundation for all workforce development within the state.
I could do this because I take pride in not fitting in. Not only am I a woman, but I have an accent and look different from others in most rooms. Colleagues at times would comment on my impatience, the impossibility of doing what I was doing, or even make snarky comments about how I approach scientific methodology (choosing value and meaning, at times, over statistical rigor). In response, I smile. Rather than feeling self-doubt, I feel more emboldened. And I won’t stop.
As a mostly Western woman, the best thing I can offer is compassion and a willingness to see the power of each unique story without imposing my own values. I live my life connecting with the stories of others, breaking stereotypes about how women like me should look and act in the tech industry, and providing the same agnosticism to every woman I meet, no matter how she looks or dresses. I soak their beauty in, and continue to inspire and get inspired.
Work-Life Balance Means Something Different- Kelly’s Story
It all started with the need to keep my job and financially support my family…all while pregnant, on 10 weeks of hospital bed rest, and with only a Blackberry to work on. By the time my original full-time role was offered to me again, it was three years later–I now had two children, and was making “too much” money in the commission-only role I’d been forced to agree to in order to keep my job.
The startup I worked for did not offer paid maternity leave. When my two daughters were each born a full month early, I only had two months of state disability payments to supplement my family’s income. Then, when my son was born, there were complications with the C-section and I could only afford to take three weeks of maternity leave. My full-time role required a lot of travel, so I had to pump in airport bathrooms and dingy office closets with no locks. It was devastating every time airport security confiscated my breast milk or when it would spoil because I couldn’t find refrigeration.
Between being unable to afford childcare, working while my babies were sleeping, and traveling with IV medication during my high-risk pregnancies, I was reaching the end of my rope. I was working harder and harder to keep up with my growing family all while striving to prove my worth to my employers. My life was exhausting, but it was also exhausting to see women, myself included, get passed over for promotions and raises all while working themselves to death.
So, I quit, even though I had no other jobs lined up and no financial safety net in place. I was left with extreme burnout and little in my favor but a gut feeling that somehow, I would figure out how to help make sure other women–including my daughters–never had to be treated this way.
I started by helping other moms find remote work that could be done while their children were in school. I helped them craft resumes that take into account the skills they learned while running a household and taking care of their children. Eventually, I had the opportunity to get involved with national and international initiatives–like the Girl Scouts, Mother’s Monday, and Careforce–in which I was able to empower young girls, working parents, policymakers, and those creating new technology solutions with the goal of massive societal change that positively impacts all women.
Sexy Like A Book: Saying YES to Girls’ Education- Patrice’s Story
Growing up during the Liberian civil war, books became my best friends, thanks to the encouragement of my mother and older sister.
These books were my safe haven. They introduced me to a world beyond the horrors of my tiny shores. They took me to places like Italy’s lush vineyards, bustling Lagos, Paris’ L'Avenue des Champs Élysées the fashion-laden Manhattan streets, and South Africa’s Johannesburg. In these places there was no sound of guns, and I could bond with characters experiencing things I’d yet to imagine, let alone see.
These are fond memories, but in reality, I was a child in a conflict zone who–like many girls today–was faced with barriers in many aspects of my life, especially education. These experiences ignited my passion for writing and for storytelling. They further inspired me to follow my mother’s footsteps to become an educator and try to address some of the educational barriers faced by women and girls in conflict and post-conflict societies.
The end of Liberia’s civil war brought in a new era with the election of Africa’s first female president. In 2006 I took on a new role as well, that of Miss Liberia. As my nation grappled with challenges brought on by the civil war and its reconstruction, Miss Liberia was more than a title for me. While it posed unique challenges, it was also a call to serve my country (in an ambassadorial role) and people (by championing issues impacting girls).
Among those issues is access to secondary education. Around 129 million girls around the world are unable to attend school, according to a 2022 UNICEF report. Finding ways to engage and support these girls on their education journey is more critical than ever.
This is why I launched initiatives like the Martha Juah Educational Foundation, which helps bring education resources to girls in rural Liberia, and Sexy Like A Book. The latter is an initiative designed to improve girls’ perspectives on education and literacy and provide them with the confidence and skills they need to make informed decisions and become socially conscious young leaders.
These initiatives say “YES” to books, scholarships, and other resources for girls who need help to achieve their educational dreams. But we can all do more, and as we observe International Women’s Day, we should also challenge one another to find more ways to say “YES” to advancing the rights of women and girls.
I was given the chance to dream and transcend the realities of my world, and am committed to doing this for the next generation. I urge all women to also say “YES,” to reach out and ignite that bookish spark in a girl today, because…
Every girl has the power to rise above limitations.
Every girl has the power to rewrite her story.
Every girl has the power to dream beyond boundaries and borders.
Every girl has the power to be more than what society envisages for her.
Every girl has a voice;
the strength and will,
To lead
To rise
To stand up and represent a greater purpose in her community.
Every girl's voice can shape and change narratives.
Girls have the power!
Anyone Can be Anything- Cynthia’s Story
I have no birth certificate, and therefore no exact proof of precisely where or when I was born. As a girl born in South Korea at the beginning of the 1970s, I could have been limited by this sense of alienation. Instead, it has been liberating. Ever since I can remember, I believed I could be anything I wanted to be.
I was adopted as an infant from South Korea and moved to the U.S., where I grew up in a multicultural, multi-ethnic family. My parents are both White and my sister, who is also adopted, is Black. In retrospect, this was highly unusual in the 70’s and speaks strongly of the open-mindedness and open-heartedness of my parents. Rather than feeling unrooted due to my confusing upbringing, I was grounded in an environment of inclusiveness, equity, intellectual curiosity, and international engagement.
We moved frequently during my childhood, often to small towns in the U.S. that were predominantly White. In high school, I was constantly mistaken for any one of the other five or six Asian girls. “Oh, I know your sister,” they would tell me, referring to one of the other Asian students with whom I had no familial relation at all. But it didn’t bother me. My parents had given both my sister and me a strong sense of home and belonging–we felt connected to one another and to the world at large.
As an adult, I have continued this itinerant lifestyle, making my home in different countries and continents while finding work across different sectors and industries. As a parent, now, of both a daughter and a son, I think about how important the things my parents gave me were: home, roots, mindset, and identity. I am a mother, wife, daughter, executive, expat, community member, and a dozen other things that pull me in a dozen different directions.
I can be anything, but I cannot be everything. The best I can do is weave together the things about which I care the most.
Social equity is one of those things. Crafting the work of the Innovation Foundation, as a Social Innovation Lab, has let me zero-in on the needs of people who face barriers to employment. Working with young mothers in Mexico to create pathways into work helps them keep their children nearby and safe, a luxury that my birth mother may not have had. Helping blue collar women in Spain come back after career breaks lets me show my daughter that caring responsibilities do not have to mean an exit from work.
Most women don’t have a voice when it comes to the world of work. Mostly, we are struggling just to remain in the labor force, or even to enter it in the first place. As a woman who is intimately familiar with these barriers, I love that I’m able to work collaboratively with other women to create real change from the ground up.
Being from nowhere and anywhere is liberating because family and home are things that can be created—not only born into. Ultimately, it means that anyone can be anything.
Women at Risk, Women to the Rescue
Our stories don’t encapsulate the deadliest of the tough battles women and girls fight every day in various parts of the world. Yet we have shared them anyway, in the hope that we can shine a spotlight on issues women continue to face today. We also want to raise awareness of some of the resources available for assistance and organizations that are fighting for our rights and those of future generations.
a global affairs media network
Women Can Save Each Other and the World
Image via Adobe Photostock.
March 8, 2023
Women leaders have a special power and a special responsibility, to one another and to future generations. Here, powerful female voices from the Diplomatic Courier network share their stories of adversity overcome and inspirational leadership.
I
n 2010, His Holiness the Dalai Lama gave a talk in Canada and said something that helped me recognize that I have a certain kind of privilege–and a certain kind of power–that I didn’t see before.
The Dalai Lama told the crowd that he is a feminist, and that as a feminist he believes that women from the Western world have the power to come to the rescue of the world at large. For me, that meant sharing painful stories with my women colleagues around the world to make it easier for them to do the same.
At my first job, I had to wear pantyhose, and my boss at the jewelry store checked my adherence to the rule by running his hand down my leg every time I clocked in. The sick feeling of unease this gave me is known to girls and women of all ages. The knowing that it was wrong but not having the knowledge or the power to change it and worse, feeling that it was somehow my fault. I put up with this for many reasons, but mostly because I was 18 in college and needed the extra money. They also allowed me to bring my index study cards, but I had to keep them hidden and was not allowed to bring in any books. Message received - pretty girls did not need to be reading.
I used to tell stories and anecdotes like this to women in my global company, and I would hear the distinct sound of their hitched breath. It shocked my friends and proteges worldwide–from India to Eastern Europe, the Middle East, New York, and Louisiana. They would tell me privately that they thought I was courageous for saying such things on a worldwide stage. But I had learned something–by sharing my own story, I showed my female colleagues that they are seen and that they have a safe place to tell their own stories.
The following is a set of perspectives gathered through the collective wisdom of women around the world. These perspectives showcase the cognitive dissonance felt every day by women who work–and often thrive–in contexts that don’t necessarily invite them to succeed and often reward them for staying small and quiet and "good”. These are also love letters to those women who, unseen and unsung, champion other women by pushing for systemic change, often at significant risk to themselves and their families.
–Beth Rudden
Don’t Despise Small Beginnings- Chandra’s Story
Ten years ago, while I was working as a full-time employee at Louisiana State University and raising two beautiful girls, I also owned a Mommy & Me boutique in a small community in southern Louisiana. As a mom, I always had a passion for positively impacting other moms and women. Although my impact was local to a small town in Louisiana at the time, it was very meaningful. In fact, it was the start of an amazing journey that would eventually allow my impact to span across the country and beyond. It was an essential piece of the journey that led me to The Mom Project and beyond.
Everything I have been through–each job that I’ve had, every challenge I've faced–has allowed me to be a source of inspiration in the lives of the many women I connect with on a daily basis.
As the Vice President of RISE at The Mom Project, I am thrilled to lead an initiative that helps other moms and women of color gain access to greater economic opportunities. I started my career as a high school Spanish teacher and strategically pivoted, multiple times, in order to get access to economic opportunity and to the life that I’d been dreaming of. I moved from Louisiana to Silicon Valley to find greater economic opportunities for me and my family and now, with RISE, I can create the same opportunities for other women without forcing them to move across the country.
Searching for Identity and Agency- Yustina’s Story
I was never really able to put a finger on my identity. I never really fit. I was born in Austin, Texas, but lived most of my childhood and early professional career in Cairo, Egypt. There, I was always accused of being “too liberal,” “too westernized,” “too emboldened,” even as I strove to dress on the more modest and conservative side compared to my colleagues. I was 24 and alone when I moved to New York City with only two pieces of luggage–one filled with clothing and the other with my most treasured possessions, my books. I soon understood that I didn’t fit in here, either. But then I realized something–neither did any woman or any person in NYC. We were all misfits, and we were proud of it. I am still proud of it.
By some kind of coincidence, I found myself at the head of the Labor Market Information division for the State of New Jersey, managing a team of 65 people, only to become 100 as the Great Recession took us all by surprise. With this sudden onslaught of responsibility, I discovered within myself a power and a voice for transformation that I didn’t know I had. I pushed for a new paradigm for workforce development. That paradigm became a foundation for all workforce development within the state.
I could do this because I take pride in not fitting in. Not only am I a woman, but I have an accent and look different from others in most rooms. Colleagues at times would comment on my impatience, the impossibility of doing what I was doing, or even make snarky comments about how I approach scientific methodology (choosing value and meaning, at times, over statistical rigor). In response, I smile. Rather than feeling self-doubt, I feel more emboldened. And I won’t stop.
As a mostly Western woman, the best thing I can offer is compassion and a willingness to see the power of each unique story without imposing my own values. I live my life connecting with the stories of others, breaking stereotypes about how women like me should look and act in the tech industry, and providing the same agnosticism to every woman I meet, no matter how she looks or dresses. I soak their beauty in, and continue to inspire and get inspired.
Work-Life Balance Means Something Different- Kelly’s Story
It all started with the need to keep my job and financially support my family…all while pregnant, on 10 weeks of hospital bed rest, and with only a Blackberry to work on. By the time my original full-time role was offered to me again, it was three years later–I now had two children, and was making “too much” money in the commission-only role I’d been forced to agree to in order to keep my job.
The startup I worked for did not offer paid maternity leave. When my two daughters were each born a full month early, I only had two months of state disability payments to supplement my family’s income. Then, when my son was born, there were complications with the C-section and I could only afford to take three weeks of maternity leave. My full-time role required a lot of travel, so I had to pump in airport bathrooms and dingy office closets with no locks. It was devastating every time airport security confiscated my breast milk or when it would spoil because I couldn’t find refrigeration.
Between being unable to afford childcare, working while my babies were sleeping, and traveling with IV medication during my high-risk pregnancies, I was reaching the end of my rope. I was working harder and harder to keep up with my growing family all while striving to prove my worth to my employers. My life was exhausting, but it was also exhausting to see women, myself included, get passed over for promotions and raises all while working themselves to death.
So, I quit, even though I had no other jobs lined up and no financial safety net in place. I was left with extreme burnout and little in my favor but a gut feeling that somehow, I would figure out how to help make sure other women–including my daughters–never had to be treated this way.
I started by helping other moms find remote work that could be done while their children were in school. I helped them craft resumes that take into account the skills they learned while running a household and taking care of their children. Eventually, I had the opportunity to get involved with national and international initiatives–like the Girl Scouts, Mother’s Monday, and Careforce–in which I was able to empower young girls, working parents, policymakers, and those creating new technology solutions with the goal of massive societal change that positively impacts all women.
Sexy Like A Book: Saying YES to Girls’ Education- Patrice’s Story
Growing up during the Liberian civil war, books became my best friends, thanks to the encouragement of my mother and older sister.
These books were my safe haven. They introduced me to a world beyond the horrors of my tiny shores. They took me to places like Italy’s lush vineyards, bustling Lagos, Paris’ L'Avenue des Champs Élysées the fashion-laden Manhattan streets, and South Africa’s Johannesburg. In these places there was no sound of guns, and I could bond with characters experiencing things I’d yet to imagine, let alone see.
These are fond memories, but in reality, I was a child in a conflict zone who–like many girls today–was faced with barriers in many aspects of my life, especially education. These experiences ignited my passion for writing and for storytelling. They further inspired me to follow my mother’s footsteps to become an educator and try to address some of the educational barriers faced by women and girls in conflict and post-conflict societies.
The end of Liberia’s civil war brought in a new era with the election of Africa’s first female president. In 2006 I took on a new role as well, that of Miss Liberia. As my nation grappled with challenges brought on by the civil war and its reconstruction, Miss Liberia was more than a title for me. While it posed unique challenges, it was also a call to serve my country (in an ambassadorial role) and people (by championing issues impacting girls).
Among those issues is access to secondary education. Around 129 million girls around the world are unable to attend school, according to a 2022 UNICEF report. Finding ways to engage and support these girls on their education journey is more critical than ever.
This is why I launched initiatives like the Martha Juah Educational Foundation, which helps bring education resources to girls in rural Liberia, and Sexy Like A Book. The latter is an initiative designed to improve girls’ perspectives on education and literacy and provide them with the confidence and skills they need to make informed decisions and become socially conscious young leaders.
These initiatives say “YES” to books, scholarships, and other resources for girls who need help to achieve their educational dreams. But we can all do more, and as we observe International Women’s Day, we should also challenge one another to find more ways to say “YES” to advancing the rights of women and girls.
I was given the chance to dream and transcend the realities of my world, and am committed to doing this for the next generation. I urge all women to also say “YES,” to reach out and ignite that bookish spark in a girl today, because…
Every girl has the power to rise above limitations.
Every girl has the power to rewrite her story.
Every girl has the power to dream beyond boundaries and borders.
Every girl has the power to be more than what society envisages for her.
Every girl has a voice;
the strength and will,
To lead
To rise
To stand up and represent a greater purpose in her community.
Every girl's voice can shape and change narratives.
Girls have the power!
Anyone Can be Anything- Cynthia’s Story
I have no birth certificate, and therefore no exact proof of precisely where or when I was born. As a girl born in South Korea at the beginning of the 1970s, I could have been limited by this sense of alienation. Instead, it has been liberating. Ever since I can remember, I believed I could be anything I wanted to be.
I was adopted as an infant from South Korea and moved to the U.S., where I grew up in a multicultural, multi-ethnic family. My parents are both White and my sister, who is also adopted, is Black. In retrospect, this was highly unusual in the 70’s and speaks strongly of the open-mindedness and open-heartedness of my parents. Rather than feeling unrooted due to my confusing upbringing, I was grounded in an environment of inclusiveness, equity, intellectual curiosity, and international engagement.
We moved frequently during my childhood, often to small towns in the U.S. that were predominantly White. In high school, I was constantly mistaken for any one of the other five or six Asian girls. “Oh, I know your sister,” they would tell me, referring to one of the other Asian students with whom I had no familial relation at all. But it didn’t bother me. My parents had given both my sister and me a strong sense of home and belonging–we felt connected to one another and to the world at large.
As an adult, I have continued this itinerant lifestyle, making my home in different countries and continents while finding work across different sectors and industries. As a parent, now, of both a daughter and a son, I think about how important the things my parents gave me were: home, roots, mindset, and identity. I am a mother, wife, daughter, executive, expat, community member, and a dozen other things that pull me in a dozen different directions.
I can be anything, but I cannot be everything. The best I can do is weave together the things about which I care the most.
Social equity is one of those things. Crafting the work of the Innovation Foundation, as a Social Innovation Lab, has let me zero-in on the needs of people who face barriers to employment. Working with young mothers in Mexico to create pathways into work helps them keep their children nearby and safe, a luxury that my birth mother may not have had. Helping blue collar women in Spain come back after career breaks lets me show my daughter that caring responsibilities do not have to mean an exit from work.
Most women don’t have a voice when it comes to the world of work. Mostly, we are struggling just to remain in the labor force, or even to enter it in the first place. As a woman who is intimately familiar with these barriers, I love that I’m able to work collaboratively with other women to create real change from the ground up.
Being from nowhere and anywhere is liberating because family and home are things that can be created—not only born into. Ultimately, it means that anyone can be anything.
Women at Risk, Women to the Rescue
Our stories don’t encapsulate the deadliest of the tough battles women and girls fight every day in various parts of the world. Yet we have shared them anyway, in the hope that we can shine a spotlight on issues women continue to face today. We also want to raise awareness of some of the resources available for assistance and organizations that are fighting for our rights and those of future generations.
